Navigating a roommate at a U.S university

By Saskia Perez-Cooke, North Carolina State University, United States.

With the majority of study abroad exchanges in the US having a roommate is the norm. Whilst sharing a room is a concept us at UOM are not used to and something that I was really worried about, it is fundamentally not as bad as you expect. The tips below are what I am using currently to navigate this completely new living situation.

1. If you have the option to, chose your roommate. As nice as the idea sounds to have a random roommate turn into best friend, it is in practice quite unlikely. This is not my attempt to put you off a roommate at all but simply to inform you of the reality of sharing your room with a complete stranger. Many US unis have to option for you to request a roommate when you learn of your resident hall. If you happen to know anyone going to the same university and hall as you, have a think whether you could co-exist with them in a room. I personally knew 2 other girls from UOM in the same international residence halls and whilst I didn’t give requesting a roommate much thought, as soon as I was assigned a roommate who was very different to me, I regretted not being open to the idea of rooming with those girls. The key to happy year abroad in the US is that your roommate has a similar schedule and work-life balance/attitude. If you happen to know people with these things (whether you are actually friends or not), do some thinking about whether you could co-exist happily with them and use that to inform your decisions about whether you follow the random-roommate or the request-roommate route

2. Open lines of communication early on. If you can find them on social media/university email I would recommend reaching out so the actual process of moving in is a bit less daunting. Importantly in these messages you could share a bit about yourself and put your expectations out there early on. Establishing these lines of communication early on can help set up positive vibes before you even move in. Whether you end up getting on with your roommate or not, having a positive living space for the first few daunting weeks is essential for a smooth transition into your new life!

3. Be open minded towards having a new routine. My best piece of advice is to be out of your room as much as possible. If you can study elsewhere, do. If you can see your friends outside, do. Whilst this may feel daunting to some that value their room as a primary place to relax, you will quickly learn to find other ways/other places to decompress. For me this new space to relax has been the gym which is a sentence I never thought I would say but it goes to show that with this new experience you have to be open minded to changing your routine and spaces up a bit!

4. Act before its too late. Whilst these tips are helping me navigating living with someone who is not my friend, nor has a similar schedule to me and different boundaries, sometimes it is true that roommates just don’t work out which renders the above advice as useless. I have found most U.S unis are more helpful in sorting out changes to housing arrangements than UK unis simply due to the fact that often roommates just don’t get on. Plenty of my friends changed rooms and roommates very easily which I hope gives you some reassurance that whatever this unique situation turns out to be like for you, there is always support around you to help my your living environment the best it can be! The super key thing is that if you can tell by week 2 that you simply cannot live with your roommate any longer let your university’s study abroad office/resident advisor know ASAP as it only gets trickier to swap roommates as the year goes on.

I hope these words of advice give you a general idea of what sharing a room will be like and how you can make the best out of the situation. Remember that your year abroad is about so much more than your room so do not let it put you off the opportunity of studying in the U.S!!