The Exchange Comedown : Navigating Reverse Culture Shock

By Nina Vincent, Australian National University, Canberra, Australia

Why Coming Home After Exchange Was Harder Than Leaving

If you’ve found yourself on Manchester on the Road, I suspect you’re either deciding whether or not to do a year abroad, or maybe you’ve already been allocated your destination and are looking for more info before you leave.

If this is you, I’m sure you’ve already come across loads of information preparing you for all the ways things will be different in your exchange country — culturally, academically, and socially. Living in a completely different place with a different history and culture… your way of life inevitably changes too.

It’s great to be prepared for this, but something I think is often overlooked is the reverse experience. What happens when your exchange ends, and you come back to your life at home. It can be a confronting experience.

You might feel overwhelmed by how familiar everything is, yet how different you feel inside. Overwhelmed by the list of people to see, the questions to answer : ones that no words can really explain. If anything, it might feel like words cheapen your experience. You may find it hard to relate to those around you in the same way.

While you’re happy to be home, it can still be a difficult transition. You’ve re-entered reality, and your year of vast new experiences stands in stark contrast to the mundanity of the same old streets, routines, and familiar faces.

It can almost feel like a comedown after a year of exciting novelty. As time begins to accelerate, your old exchange life can feel like a parallel universe or like a hazy dream you’ve woken from, unsure if it ever really happened.

Here are some things helping me deal with reverse culture shock:

Be prepared for this feeling.

If you’re reading this, you’re already one step ahead. Knowing what to expect can really help soften the landing. Just like with any kind of anxiety, awareness of the feeling itself, knowing it’s normal to feel uncertain or overwhelmed can release some of the weight.

Extend kindness to yourself.

Meet yourself where you’re at. Be self compassionate.
If you’re overwhelmed, that’s okay, you will get through it.
If you’re overstimulated, accept that as part of the process.
On the other hand, if you’re excited and thrilled to be home, enjoy that feeling.
Whatever you’re experiencing, don’t judge it. You’re navigating a major transition, and there’s no “right” way to feel.

Have things to look forward to.

Make a list of things you missed or can’t wait to do now that you’re home — whether it’s a trip to M&S for picky bits or a coffee at your favourite café. It’s helpful when you’re feeling overwhelmed with what to do with your time.

Or make a few plans – concerts, short trips to visit friends — or maybe you just want to enjoy being home and not over-schedule. That’s valid too.

Don’t overcommit your time.

When you first get back, try not to pack your calendar. You’ll be in high demand after being away for a year, but constant catch-ups can leave you feeling burnt out and socially drained.

Take your first week slowly. Spend time with your family. Let yourself settle. Give yourself permission to take as much time as you need to feel grounded again before diving into a full schedule.

Stay in touch with your exchange friends.

After this incredible year, I’m sure you’ve formed some beautiful friendships with people from all over the world. Stay connected. Text, call, reach out. These are the people who get it. They’ve experienced it too — and sharing how you feel with them can be so grounding.

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If you follow these tips, I’m sure you’ll manage your reverse culture shock wonderfully. Just remember to be kind to yourself. You should be so proud of how far you’ve come and how much you’ve grown this year. Of course it’s going to take time to readjust — that’s okay. Just take it day by day.

If anyone wants to reach out, my email is nina.vincent@student.manchester.ac.uk